The Adventures of Hopper the Callistana
by Bookboyfriends
Summary: The Adventures of Hopper the Callistana are one shot stories imagined from the life of Hopper from Richelle Mead's Bloodlines Series.
1. Chapter 1: Onions in the Freezer

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of Richelle Mead's characters or plot. All events written about are fictional and should not be directly associated with the published works of Ms. Mead.**

ONIONS IN THE FREEZER

* * *

Hopper was warming himself in the fire while his dad, Adrian, was painting. Hopper watched as yellow paint was turned into gold strands and rich brown eyes. Soon, a likeness of Hopper's mother was smiling down at him from the canvas.

"Argh! Why won't you work" shouted Adrian suddenly, ripping the canvas off his easel. Hopper leapt out of the fire eagerly, bouncing over to the discarded canvas. It smelled good and he tested its flavour with the tip of his tongue. Adrian watched him with a bemused expression.

At least, until Hopper decided to take a chomp out of the canvas.

"Hopper! You annoying little-just because I don't like it doesn't mean you can ruin it!" Hopper felt himself being lifted up by a pair of paint-splattered hands. He wriggled, trying to get back to the delicious paints, and succeeded in dropping back to the ground.

"Hopper!" shouted his father, coming after him.

But in that moment, falling to earth, he spied a whole palette of fresh pain! Landing, he scampered up the leg of the table and dove in, his mouth read for fresh paint.

"No, no, no, no, no, no get out! Stop it! That's my good paint!" shouted Adrian, reaching for him and trapping him again. Hopper outed in the darkness. The paint tasted so good!

This time though, Adrian had been sure to trap him in both hands, with only a small peephole for his beady golden eyes to look through.

Through his father's fingers, Hopper watched his favourite room come into view: The kitchen! He scampered around happily in the palm of Adrian's closed fist, excitedly croaking as they made their way towards the refrigerator. But what was this? Why was his dad opening the freezer? And suddenly what Hopper had seen through the peephole became reality.

Hopper had been put into the freezer.

He looked up at Adrian with wide pleading eyes. There were frozen onions in the freezer and he scurried forward, trying to escape, but Adrian glared down at him.

"I will paint one that works," he promised him, "without you eating all my paint! You already ate four pies and the leftover pizza as well as half my cooking sherry! Maybe in here you'll stay out of trouble for a while! And no fire for you."

Hopper looked back morosely as the freezer door shut, ending the freezer into darkness.

He could hear banging noises going on in the lounge.

The onions were sharp and the freezer smelled of nothing but onions. Onion tears began to leak out of Hopper's little golden eyes, then froze as they hit the frigid air. He could only muster a small helpless croak before he was frozen too.

A few hours later, he finally heard voices. His mother! They got louder and he could hear footsteps approaching the refridgerator.

He couldn't jump around in excitement as he wanted to, but his eyes boggled for him.

Sydney opened the freezer door, looking concerned.

She sighed in exasperation and lifted the Hopper ice-cube in her hands, carrying him over to the fire and dumping him in.

"What did he do now?" Sydney asked Adrian as the ice began to drip off Hopper's scales.

"He keeps trying to eat my paints when I'm concentrating!" Adrian retorted.

"But did you have to put him in the freezer?"

"Hey, it's fitting punishment!"

"Remind me never to let you discipline the children," Sydney said wryly.

"Children?" asked Adrian with a grin, slipping his arms around her.

"Future children," Sydney replied with a reluctant grin as Hopper finished defrosting, then scurried up Sydney's leg and up to her shoulder, curling up to join the family hug.


	2. Chapter 2: The Magic of Chilli

**DISCLAIMER: ****I do not own any of Richelle Mead's characters or plot. All events written about are fictional and should not be directly associated with the published works of Ms. Mead.**

THE MAGIC OF CHILLI

* * *

Sydney Sage was a great mum, at least, according to Hopper. She was very smart and very pretty and very good at making magic spells with nice-smelling ingredients. She was a witch and although she could perform spells without a talisman now, she still occasionally made them to help strengthen her magic.

Hopper loved to watch her work on her potions and potpourris. The same magic that had created him was also creating other wonders by calling on the magic essence in the world around her. He transfixed his eyes on her fingers as they measured out exact amounts of ingredients and placed them into the half shell of a coconut. He wasn't exactly sure what she was making, but it looked pretty cool to Hopper.

His beady golden eyes tracked her movements and he made feeble little croaking sounds when ingredients he recognised as food were added. He crawled out of the fireplace, shaking off embers and leapt up to the workbench where Sydney was working.

"Oh bother," she muttered to herself, brushing off her hands and looking down at Hopper. "I forgot about that ingredient. How unlike me." Hopper croaked questioningly, tilting his gold-scaled head to the golden eyes widened in disbelief and he blinked twice. Sydney was very organised. It was on a rare occasion like this that she forgot anything.

She had risen and packed away some of her ingredients. "If I leave these supplies out, you're probably going to eat them, and then Adrian would probably put you in the freezer again." His mouth dropped in response. "Not that I approve," she sighed and touched him fondly on the head. The buzz of magic revitalised him and his mouth opened happily again. She picked up her bag and turned back to him.

"Hopper, just...stay here. Don't do anything stupid. And don't eat any of my supplies. Mummy's going to be right back."

With a sweep of her golden hair, she closed the door behind her.

Hopper swivelled his head back around, looking back at the workbench. There were dried rose petals still scattered on the table and a dried leaf or two. Cloves and a pile of dust were heaped together in the coconut...as well as some sort of red looking vegetable.

He'd never seen it before in his life and wondered if perhaps it tasted as good as it looked. Tiny little seeds were suspended in a juicy looking flesh. Hopper knew he wasn't supposed to eat any of the supplies...but Sydney hadn't said anything about the half-finished spell.

He crept forward, claws making little scrabbling noises against the wood. He reached the half coconut shell and reaching over the rim, he peered inside. Sure enough, there were some cut up pieces of the mystery red vegetable.

Guilty, but hungry, he scampered inside the coconut shell and picked up one of the circles in his two front claws. He sniffed it.

Nothing.

Ooh wait, a little sensation up his nose.

Blinking, he opened his mouth, but suddenly heard the sound of his father's voice coming down the hall. Huriedly, he placed all the red circled pieces of mystery vegetable in his mouth and tried to bury himself under the dust and leaves already in the shell.

And that's when the burning started.

He felt his eyes well up with Callistana tears and his whole head felt like someone had thrown him in his fireplace and turned up the heat by another thousand percent. He swallowed...and then realised that wasn't the best idea, for the burning trailed down his throat and now his head and stomach was spicy! He yelped, desperate croaking as he scurried around, wondering how the pain was ever going to stop. He clawed at his mouth, his eyes streaming with tears.

Adrian rushed in with a wild expression. "Sydney? Are you okay?"

His eyes fell on Hopper, whose gold scales were now turning red with the hotness in his mouth.

"Hopper? What did you eat now?" Adrian reached his finger out, green eyes exasperated, but jerked back his finger when he made contact with Hopper's scales. He swore. "What the- Hopper you're burning up! You're really hot! Crap!" He flicked out his phone. "SYDNEY?"

Hopper wasn't really sure what was happening. He was blinded by his tears and he wished for anything to have frozen onion tears on his face instead. That hadn't nearly been anywhere as painful as this. Suddenly, he felt the warmth catch up to him. It felt like he had swallowed the fire he generally liked to curl up in.

In fact, if he squinted open his eyes, he was sure he could see flames curling around the sides of the shell...

Sydney burst through the door and she and Adrian both came over to Hopper just as he felt a belch come from deep in his stomach and up his throat.

What happened next, none of them were expecting.

Fire soared from Hopper's mouth and Sydney and Adrian both exclaimed in surprise. "Hopper!" they cried together as the coconut shell blackened along with the other ingredients.

But the burning was leaving him, or the pain was at least. He could still feel a swirl of fire in his little golden belly and after the initial release of flame, he managed to contain it. He croaked and watched his parent's shoulders sag with relief.

He opened his mouth and tried again, letting a little of the fire in his stomach to come up. A little puff of flame came out and this time Sydney's face filled with wonder and then a rueful smile lifted one side of her mouth.

"Why Hopper you cheeky little dragon. You ate the chilli?" she asked, and held up the mystery vegetable which Hopper now knew as 'chilli.' He croaked shamefully and crawled out of the burnt shell onto the benchtop.

Now Adrian was probably going to put him in the freezer.

But Sydney went on to explain to both Hopper and Adrian about how she had been making a spell to help her make the air warmer in case she and Adrian were ever in a situation where they might be cold or about to get frostbite and had to otherwise rely on fireballs or other means.

Adrian grinned at Sydney and Hopper was sure he'd missed something but she explained how the unfinished spell must have only been up to the fir creation part and now Hopper had ingested it. She wasn't sure if she could reverse it.

Suddenly she turned back to Hopper. "I told you not to eat my supplies! That includes my half-finished spells! You could have seriously harmed yourself!" She gave the rest of the unused chilli to Adrian and barely glanced at it as he played the role of not-pleased-parent.

Hopper looked down in shame. Adrian just shook his head. But Sydney kissed the top of his head. "But I forgive you and I'm just glad you're okay."

"And I'm not even going to put you in the freezer," Adrian added and lifted his hand. "Even though you deserve it." And he absently bit down on what he'd thought was an apple.

Hopper's eyes widened and a gleeful grin spread across his scaled face as he watched Adrian's expression freeze and his eyes begin to water.


	3. Chapter 3: The Autumn Pie Festival

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own any or RIchelle Mead's characters or plot. All events written about are fictional and should not be directly associated with the published works of Ms. Mead.**

THE AUTUMN PIE FESTIVAL

It was that time of year again. Every year, in the attempt to entice colder weather, the Palm Springs community held the Autumn Pie Festival. It was Hopper the Callistana's favourite time of the year...mostly because his parents, Sydney and Adrian Ivashkov, were always cooking in preparation. This of course meant leftovers!

"Hopper! Do you want this last slice of pie?" came his mother's voice from the kitchen, which had been painted Springtime Yellow by his father. Hopper perked up from where he'd been nestled amongst the coals. He growled a small growl of approval and then scrambled his claws over the tiled floor, racing to the kitchen.

He leapt up onto the plate, instantly going to the pie leftovers. Adrian meanwhile, inspected his own piece of pie, poking around at the filling with his fork. "I'm telling you, Sage, this might be the one!" He turned to Hopper who looked up guiltily, tongue motionless on a bit of pastry. "Don't you agree Hopper?"

Hopper swallowed quickly just in case they were going to try and take the pie away, then nodded, gazing up at Sydney. He'd be glad for any more pie she made, because that meant more leftovers! And it was always good to agree with Adrian, in case he put him in the freezer.

"Well, I just thought it could have used a bigger variety of flavours..." Sydney trailed off. "You could add some spices, just a bit of chilli..."

Hopper froze. That word...chilli. He didn't want Adrian to make a chilli pie. Hopper had had enough experience with chilli to last a lifetime. He turned his wide eyes up at Adrian begging him not to use chilli.

"Ah, but Sage, sometimes simpler is better," countered Adrian. "Any artist knows that. Otherwise it clouds the senses."

Hopper didn't mind it what flavour the pie was as long as it wasn't chilli. The crunch of the golden pastry sliding over warm filling, whether savoury or sweet, he didn't mind. He finished off every last morsel on the plate under the watchful gaze of his parents, then grinned cheekily and bounded off to the dying flames before they could think to reprimand him.

He was so excited! Tomorrow was the big festival which included a parade, pie tasting, pie eating competitions and pies everywhere all day long! He closed his little golden eyes and snuggled against the coals his head already filling with dreams of crispy golden pastry and filling.

The next morning, Hopper was up before the sun. He bounded across the room, claws almost slipping on the tiles in his excitement, and into the kitchen. There on the bench were two massive pies. The labels were written in ink and read 'Sydney and Adrian Ivashkov'. Under their names, the one on the left said 'pumpkin pie' and the one on the right said 'apple and rhubarb pie'. Hopper's mouth watered at the sight, but he clamped his little claws over his mouth, knowing how hard his parents had worked. If they wanted to win the pie competition, he'd better not eat their entry.

An hour later, Sydney and Adrian were up and dressed, the pies had been warmed and they were out the door, Hopper snuggled inside Sydney's scarf. Adrian's hair ruffled in the breeze, meaning it was definitely not cold enough for hair gel to freeze. It was never cold enough in Palm Springs.

Soon, they could hear the sounds of the festival. Musical instruments and advertisers shouted out slogans and brand names because as well as being a pie festival, it was also a chance for the Palm Springs community to advertise their businesses. There were flags with pies on them and posters with pies, there were pie key chains in the stalls on the streets and plush pie pillows being sold by street vendors.

"Uh, uh, uh!" Sydney chastised, before Hopper could take a chomp out of a pie shaped stress ball.

Soon, they came to a massive building where a banner advertised the 'Pie Judging Competition'. They entered their pies and then had a look around. Hopper, beady eyes ever alert, squealed, then jumped out of Sydney's scarf. Then, kicking up little puffs of dust, found the table with the 'Pie Eating Competition!' How exciting! Free pies and no parents to stop him!

Glancing over his shoulder to make sure Adrian and Sydney weren't looking, he clawed his way up the table leg...and came eye to shocked eye with the curly haired woman in charge.

Hopper froze, then an innocent grin thawed his face as he blinked his wide gold eyes at her and put his little paw out. Her finger approached his head and then tapped him right on the nose. Hopper felt his brains rattle, and shook his head to clear it while she looked on incredulously. Under her watchful and shocked gaze, he climbed onto the sign up sheet and looked back up at the woman, pointing to a blank space with his golden paw.

The woman, whose mouth had now fallen open, put a pen in his claw. Sighing, Hopper scribbled on his paw until it was covered in blue ink, then stamped it in the blank spot. Satisfied, he turned to give the pen back to the woman, but she'd fallen out of her chair. All he could see now were two pudgy stockinged legs.

Not knowing what else he could possibly do for the poor woman, Hopper went to the contestant table, ready for his first pie. There were a few people watching, but thankfully not Adrian or Sydney because they would surely stop him from eating any more of his beloved pie!

But there was someone else he knew standing in front of him.

"My, my, shouldn't you be with Sydney?" said Jackie Terwilliger. "This is no place for a callistana. Out in the open, where anyone could see. What a total lack of subtlety." She took out a handkerchief and started dabbing dust on Hopper.

Hopper's eyes filled. Did she mean he wasn't going to be able to participate in the eating competition and get free pie? Perhaps the audience would be too surprised to see a golden dragon on the table, unless they thought it was a child's toy. Hopper's little beating heart sank.

But Jackie was muttering something as she dabbed, and suddenly Hopper felt his vision swim. What was going on? He shook his head with a faint mewl, trying to clear it... when he had the sudden revelation that he was quite alright. There was a screen of magic in front of him that made him appear as a human to the rest of the onlookers, while keeping his true form as a small golden dragon.

"There, that should fix it," said Jackie. "Just make sure you don't eat any chilli, because that'll wear down the spell."

Hopper nodded solemnly, and watched as in front of him his human mask screen nodded as well. Jackie winked and then went back to spectate.

Soon enough, a pie was placed in front of each contestant as the start time of the competition drew closer. Hopper struggled not to dive into the pie there and then. There was a round looking man to Hopper's right and a teenage boy with a big grin to Hopper's left. The other competitors included a stick thin woman who looked like she could only eat a quarter of a pie and a rather curvy woman with quite the number of chins.

The rules were explained. Each contestant had to eat as many pies as they could in ten minutes, and it had to have been fully swallowed to count as finished. The restless onlookers and contestants could hardly take in what was being said. All eyes were glued on the digital timer that had ten minutes ready to be counted down on the front.

"On your marks...get set...GO!" came the announcer's voice, the same woman who'd 'signed' Hopper up. Hopper squealed in delight and opened his mouth to consume the pie. Twenty seconds later, the pie was gone. Another was placed in front of him and the first sheet of paper was ripped off from under him so that now it read '1'. The timer hurried towards eight minutes.

It was glorious! Pie after pie was munched up by Hopper's golden teeth and his belly expanded with each one, scales straining and belly ballooning. But still he did not stop! He had to win! He wanted to win the giant metre wide pie!

The time raced downwards and his sheet of paper read '18'. To his left, the round man was up to sixteen. Hopper swallowed quickly, he had to make sure the round man didn't win!

The timer raced through the last minute towards zero.

Crunch. Slurp. Swallow. Bite. Flip the paper.

People chanted for Hopper and the round man. Who would win? Who would win? How he gobbled and gurgled and chewed and swallowed!

Crunch. Chew. Swallow. Flip.

The bell sounded.

Cheers exploded from the onlookers, who had at least quadrupled, and confetti rained down on Hopper. He grinned, swallowing the last bit of his twentieth pie in jubilation.

Then noticed that his legs no longer touched the ground.

Instead, he was literally a round ball of golden scales with a head and stubby legs hanging uselessly in the air. He wondered what he looked like to the rest of the spectators. Probably a second round man...unless Jackie had turned him into a woman.

He was presented with his giant pie and gratefully rolled himself over to collect it...which he couldn't. He found Ms T with her hand over her eyes in exasperation, probably because he'd eaten so much. It appeared she was giggling and turned her head to talk to someone. Hopper froze when he saw who it was.

The 'someone' was Sydney...and behind her Adrian, staring straight at him, and apparently through the glamour.

Adrian looked amused, Sydney looked unimpressed.

Adrian came forward and collected Hopper's pie with him and gave the magic mask's shoulder a pat. "You sneaky little bugger," he murmured as they pushed through the crowd.

"He'll be fine Sydney, he just over-indulged," consoled Ms T.

"You know what's going to be for dinner then," Sydney said, now carrying Hopper's winnings, and then an almost wicked looking grin crossed her face. Quickly, she composed herself and then innocently fluttered her eyelids, much to Adrian's distraction. "Pie, Hopper?"

Hopper gulped and began to back away, shaking his head. He had just eaten eighteen pies! He was a round ball of golden scales for crying out loud! Ms T followed, chasing him with that red vegetable...Chilli! What had she said? The antidote to the magic mask spell was chilli!

He scurried away faster, well, as fast as he could while in the shape of a golden scaled balloon.

"Meet you two back at your house! I'll look after this one!" called Ms T, rushing out of the pie festival hall.

Hopper tried to go faster, but his belly was too huge. There was a hill on the way home, a steep one at that, and suddenly he was rolling.

Rolling, rolling, rolling.

Faster and faster, over and under, tumbling and turning down the hill, with Ms Terwilliger hot on his tail. She was giggling in glee, still waving the chilli like a crazy nurse trying to vaccinate to a child.

Down the hill he rolled, twenty pies in his belly until suddenly he froze. Ms T had stopped him mid air now that they were in a quieter part of the street.

"Hopper, it's the only way," she said, coming closer and closer. He could already smell the chilli burning up his nose as it came closer and closer.

He clamped his mouth shut, boggled eyes pleading up at Ms T not to feed him the chilli.

But in the end he had to eat it. Flames roared in his belly and came out his mouth in a fiery belch and the magic mask melted away to reveal Hopper the golden ball of scales.

"Oh Hopper, I know you wanted to eat at the pie festival, but there are always consequences," consoled Ms T, not looking very remorseful to the fiery mouthed Hopper. "Let's get you home. I think you need to deflate."

That night, Hopper lay on his back, arms and legs sticking up from his golden ball of scales by the fire. Meanwhile, Sydney, Adrian and Ms T celebrated Hopper's victory by eating his pie, while proudly sitting under the first place ribbon from Sydney's own pie.

And Hopper, for the first time in his life, didn't want a crumb!


End file.
